Why Your Child Struggles with Shoelaces?

Tying shoelaces might seem simple to adults, but for many children—especially those who are neurodivergent—it’s a complex task that requires coordination, focus, and patience. When a child struggles with shoelaces, it’s not just about the shoes. It’s about fine motor skills, hand strength, memory, and sequencing all working together.

The Skills Behind Shoelace Tying

Shoelace tying is a perfect example of a task that combines fine motor skills and cognitive planning. Here’s what’s really going on when your child learns to tie their shoes:
  • Finger coordination: The small muscles in the hands and fingers need to work together precisely. Your child must grasp, pinch, and pull the laces in different directions at just the right times.
  • Hand strength: Pulling the loops tight requires strength in the fingers and hands. Without it, the bow may slip apart quickly.
  • Memory: Your child needs to remember the steps: cross, loop, pull through, and tighten.
  • Sequencing: Each step must happen in order. If one step is skipped or out of order, the knot doesn’t hold.
If your child struggles with any of these skills, tying shoes can become frustrating and overwhelming. That’s why we often break this skill down into smaller, playful activities that build the foundation first.

4 Simple Activities to Build Shoelace-Readiness at Home

Here are some fun, everyday ways you can help your child strengthen the skills they need for successful shoe tying:
  1. Play with Beads and Strings Threading beads onto a string helps strengthen fingers and improve hand-eye coordination. Start with larger beads and thicker string, then gradually move to smaller ones as your child improves.
  2. Use Playdough for Hand Strength Have your child roll playdough into snakes, pinch it flat, or squeeze it into balls. These activities build the hand and finger muscles needed to manage and tighten laces.
  3. Practice with Lacing Cards You can buy lacing cards or make your own using cardboard and a hole punch. Encourage your child to lace around shapes like hearts or animals. This mimics the hand movements used in shoe tying and builds confidence.
  4. Do Step-by-Step “Shoelace Practice” Before working on real shoes, use a large model made from a shoebox and ribbon. The bigger size makes it easier to see and understand each step. Go slowly, and let your child practice one part at a time—such as just making loops or pulling tight.

A Gentle Reminder for Parents

Learning to tie shoes is a milestone that takes time and patience. Every child develops these fine motor and sequencing skills at their own pace. If your child becomes frustrated, it’s okay to take breaks and return later. Mastery comes from practice, play, and encouragement—not pressure.

At Tumble N’ Dots, we help children grow these skills through playful, hands-on therapy that builds strength, coordination, and confidence in every movement.